Monthly Archives: July 2011
I have being ramabling on about other misc stuff for the past few weeks. I thought I’d give a brief overview of who I am and what makes tick and all that stuff. So, heres goes…
Well, my name as you know is Adrian Collins. I have at time of writing, over 25 years of experince of living in this reality. To be fair, even from a young age, I was always the type of person who wondered why things were ‘ that way. ‘ While being thought various tidbits about religion in Primary school, I was wondering the back of my mind why so of the things were the way they were. Guess you could call me a thinker type.
I’m also what you might call ‘ introvert ‘ , probably comes with the whole thinking aspect of my personality. I also was born with a hearing deficency that wasn’t fixed until I was 3 – 4 which could have made into who I am as it meant I missed initial indoctrination. I don’t know but the point, the status quo has never really sat well with me at all.
Don’t me wrong, I do enjoy some aspects of life. I like most Irish folks, enjoy drink ( though unlike most, I don’t plan on doing so for the rest of my life. ) good food. I don’t like sports though, never was a type of pyschical aspects. I was a gamer as a child which coupled with my natural introversion meant I never really got out much when I was a child and when I did – I was the socailly inept idiot who couldn’t stay still and never got invited to birthdays again.
As for where I am right now, I’m a recent graduate with a dipolma in Multimedia. I’m also like so many others, on the dole though I’m not wasting it all on drink. I’m saving most of to be honest for future adventures.
So, what is this all about? Why I am here? Why is the blog called The Gates of Inifinty?
Well, simply put, this blog is here to tell a story. A story that I’m not sure what the ending is going to be like or when that will happen. Its a story of how I want to move away from comfort to being the ultimate bad ass authentic self, something that is sort of lacking right now.
Who inspired me? It wasn’t for stumbling across Niall Doherty’s site Disrupting The Rabblement a few months ago just as I was about to finish college, I wouldn’t be here, as simple as that. The spark was there, all I need was something ignite it and that is where Niall came in. Thanks for the spark, Niall, you could have just created a monster right here!
As for the title, simple. Right now, as I begin my Journey, I am staring at gates. Behind lays everything that I know, my life has its turned out so far, my friends, family, all the good and bad. What is behind is all what I call ‘ the packaged life ‘ ( or Rabblement to take from Niall again! ) where you go to school, get a job, get married, get a mortage, have kids, overwork for 40 years then die, etc. I don’t want that at all.
Beyond the gates lies an inifinte amount of possibilites. I wish to open the gates and move beyond where I am and into the vastness of Infinty. That is why the blog is called The Gates of Infinity.
So there you have, an introduction to who I am. Its only a small ( for now ) snippet of who I am but as we journey together. I’m sure we will get to know each other better. So come, lets us explore Inifinty together!
Inspired by the people who like to put nice big lists on their sites ( Hi, Jodi! ) I’ve decided that I should make my own list of things I want to do in my life. Keeping with the theme of infinity, I’ve called the list ‘ The Infinity List. ‘ You can call it my bucket list, things to do before I die, etc, etc.
The point is, everyone should have such a list. We only get one shot in this life ( I’m not sure if unmet goals get carried over with reincarnations ) so it is up to us to make the most of it, this list will have its own separate page on this site for ease of reference and ease of editing.
The list is not a be all and end all. It is subject to change as I either add or ( not so likely ) remove goals. The list will also act as the basis for any challenges that I will publicly issue here to help with my own personal growth ( it’s also one of the items on the list to do such a thing and yes, I already have one in mind but I’m not going to reveal it just yet. )
My life goal is to have lived a life full of experiences so that when I am old, I can look back with pride, where people know who I truly am and I have loads of stories to share with my grand children and possibly great grand children – rather being the bitter old cunt who is full of regrets and who no one really knows.
So, without further ado, here is the list.
I am a big fan of what remixes in music, preferably of the dance and trance kind. Well, today while crawling through the net for some remixes I came across a nice little remix of Green Hill Zone from Sonic the Hedgehog. The only review of the song was someone complaining that the track was ‘ too remixed. ‘
Wait…. what!? You are complaining that a remix is too remixed!? That’s what I like about remixes, that they take the original song and give a fresh new vibe and feel ( in fact, some of my favourite songs are in fact remixes ) but I digress.
‘ But Adrian, what the hell has this got to do with lifestyle and philosophy!? ‘ You cry. Hold your horses, I’m getting there. What this made me think is that conventional life is what you would call the ‘ original mix ‘ , you know that place where you conform, go to school, get a boring ass job in some place you probably hate, marry, get a vastly overpriced house in some suburbs, have kids, retire then die. For some, that is good enough for them but we have to respect the original mix, for it where all the remixes will spawn from.
Now, a remix on the other hand is where you take the original and turn upside, flip it around and make it your own. Like I said, I generally prefer remixes to the original song! When you remix your life, you say no to convention and decide to do things your own way.
What does a remixed life consist of? Any god damn thing you want. You don’t have to play by convention anymore. You could produce a remix that is similar to the original or go all out and turn it into something vastly different. You remix could be about journeys, adventures, playfulness, do it your own way attitude. Whatever it is, it is important to make it your own, take what you want from he original or you could even go ‘scratch ‘ ( This is where you remix a song without using any of the elements from the original ) and make it even more you!
To be fair, we have all done some remixing, one more or another but many of us fall back to the original mix, thinking that it is the ‘ only ‘ way as everyone is telling us as we are wrong and that we need to grow up and get some cop on. NOTHING is worse than a remix that ends abruptly. In fact, I hate that in music! I could be bopping away to a remix then it ends abruptly and I’m disgusted!
Some my message here is to remix your life, that is what we all want to do and I want to do as well. So I think it might be my blogs tagline from here in as it screams out to us to be original and go our own way in life!
You see them everywhere, everyday. They go about their lives, cursing their misfortune, cursing how things don’t go to plan, thinking that they have no control over what happens to them. They see the world around them as a threat, a world that is out to get you and will rape you, either physically, mentally or otherwise if you let it.
They fear people, thinking they have ulterior motives all the time. They fear nature, for it will conspire against them and ruin all their fun. The list could go on and on but it all boils down to one thing; fear of losing control.
The question I wish to ask is why would you want to so much control? The last time I tried to control the outcome of anything, I just ended up a bag of stress when things didn’t go the way I wanted them. Be it being stuck on my own because I was too arrogant and full of myself to arrange things with other people or not enjoying myself on a night out when that interaction with that pretty girl didn’t go according to plan or being so paralysed by fear that I didn’t do anything about it.
The reason we want so much control is because of our comfort zones. After all, if we imagine hard enough that things will go our way, we’ll get that job, we get that girl, we get everything we want in life AND we won’t have to upset are nice neat, flaming shit, status quo, balance or whatever it is. That is a sham, things never go that way, it’s the nature of the universe.
You see, the universe is chaotic, it does not like having things going to plan, it likes to be random. It’s like to bring rain on the day you want to have that BBQ, its like to hold you up in traffic on the way to work, it loves throwing rejection in your face. That said, out of its chaos, comes a balance and it is beautiful.
What is something you can do to even begin to break free of this? Simple, STOP trying to control everything! Yes, that’s right, stop demanding a certain outcome to this event, that day or whatever it is. A good thing to do is to every day, write a little note. It could be to yourself, the universe, whatever higher power takes your fancy. In this note, you will tell the universe that you are giving yourself permission to just go with the flow and not try to control everything that happens.
A recent example for me was a few weeks back, when I traveled up to Dublin for a gaming event, before I left, I wrote a note reminding myself to just go with the flow and not try to control everything, just let it happen naturally. I had a great weekend, where I fully gave myself permission to be myself and ahem…. get a little bit carried away with the drink ( pro tip: Captain Morgans + Coke + Jagermister + Chugging down a pint = Uneasy brew in stomach! ) but regardless, it was all good fun and I enjoyed the weekend throughly.
This was all helped by the fact I simply just went with the flow and let the universe decide what would happen instead of trying to control everything. That was the lesson I learned that weekend, its OK to be yourself and that its OK to screw up sometimes, we’re only human after all.
So, tomorrow morning, why don’t you write a note telling the universe that you are just going to go with the flow today and not to try to control everything that happens during your day. Try it, and leave some comments on how it affected you.